Energy Healing, Health, Journal, Planners

This Wounded Healer Takes On Building A Healing Business

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~Image from my embodiedawareness.wordpress.com~

In my last blog post I mentioned breathing problems, and, as with so many of us who live with chronic conditions, adding a new problem to my admittedly small list is a bit overwhelming. I shake, I have pain, and now I have compromised lungs. Woohoo. Not.

Three bouts of bronchitis and one of pneumonia over the past three years has done enough damage to my lungs that working in a manufacturing environment meant that the chemicals in the air necessitated inhalers, which didn’t help. More than once I got into my car at day’s end and sat there, gasping for air. After literally nearly choking to death on congestion while sick with bronchitis (the most terrifying thing you never want to go through, let me tell you), the fear of not being able to breathe is a constant, and as I tweeted, “You don’t realize how much you take breathing for granted until you can’t!”

What this has done – again, touched on in my last post – is create a determination to live the life of my dreams, helping others with my healing work. Planning isn’t my strong point, but I’ve turned my Passion Planner into a business planner, keeping track of blog and social media ideas, as well as client appointments and feedback. I’ve got my eye on a guide for business and blogging from Blessing Manifesting, too.

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I’m taking the need for little physical activity as message from the ‘verse to knock my shit off and run this business as a business, otherwise what’s the bloody point, right? Squandering my ability would be such a waste, and if I don’t do this, I’m going to look back one day and regret being too scared to really step up and make a serious go of it. I’ve done it half-assed over the years, having that “it will all work out” mentality, but in reality it hasn’t, and it’s because I blithely expected a successful business to just fall into my lap with as little effort as possible on my part. I tend to go through life that way, as I’m sure many of you have noticed. 😉

This journey is going to be something new for me, and I hope to be of service to you as I build this dream bigger than I could have ever dreamed!

©Pip Miller – November 2018

PS: All healing sessions (except Dare) are 30 minutes for $35. And you don’t even have to leave your home!

Energy Healing, Health, Journal

Shyness and Tremors and Brain Farts…

Oh, my!

I rewrote my home page the other day, and since then I’ve been thinking about my shyness. It’s causes me to actually be afraid of speaking for fear of saying something that will cause me to feel embarrassed and stupid.

I’ve lived my entire life with that feeling. I’ve become somewhat less worried about what others think as the years have gone by, but it’s still there, lurking beneath every word I’m about to say, just waiting to whisper, “Yep, you did it again, you idiot. Can’t you say anything right?? See how they’re looking at you? That’s cuz you’re dumb. You should just shut up. Always.” It sucks when you’re own mind attacks you.

My tremors began 25 years ago after my divorce, and one of the side-effects of this lovely disease/affliction/annoyance…I don’t even know what to call it…is that it affects your memory. As in, you forget words.

Do you see where I’m going here?

I can be mid-sentence, and all of a sudden a word that was right there in my head took a left turn (I’d say at Albuquerque, but I’m already here) and got lost on the way to my mouth, and something completely inane comes out if I don’t catch myself in time to just let the sentence die off*. Suddenly ‘pencil’ becomes ‘yellow thing..writes…eraser…’ if I’m lucky. Most times a word comes out that is so ridiculous that I blush beet red and want to sink into a deep hole right then and there. Embarrassment on an epic level.

I’d love to think these are just normal brain farts, but it’s happening more and more, and as a result the shyness is kicking back in again with a vengeance. I was using alcohol to give that ‘don’t care’ buffer, but I’m trying very hard not to drink anymore, so I’m kind of stuck here, swimming in anxiety over speaking, even to my guy or friends. I find myself hermitting (I know it’s not a verb, but it should be) more and more, and prefer texting over calling.

The weirdest thing? I can send someone light to help them with their anxiety, but I can’t help myself. Is that like a psychic who can’t foresee their own future? At this rate, “This Hobbit’s Life” is going to become “This Hobbit’s Hermitage”. 😉

Anyway…not really sure where I was going with all this, it just popped into my head this morning and wanted to be written down.

Much love,

Pip 🙂

©Pip Miller – May 2018

 

*Someone posted the word for that on Twitter just the other day, but I can’t find it now.

PS: the first icon was made by someone called “lit-gal” on Live Journal, the second one I made, and the third one I have no idea. I know they’re small, but they fit what I’m writing, plus, hello, Firefly! 🙂

Journal, Planners

Back to the Bullet Journal

Planners, planners, planners. What is up with all of them?? I’ve been through more types than I care to admit, and after a recent attempt at a Planner Pad (which, in and of itself, a FABULOUS planner) and finally admitting that I seriously don’t have that much to plan and so I tend to do more logging, I decided to give the BuJo a try again.

Rather than buying a new planner – though, I will be buying one of these beauties from J. B. Welly for next year!! – I took my already-in-progress journal/commonplace book/notebook and added the bujo to it. It’s a five section notebook, so I started the bujo in the 4th section so I’ll have room for the rest of the year.

I’m keeping it simple this time. Last time I watched way, way too many videos and had too many sections and it just went off the rails. Now I have The Alastair Method as my monthly setup (with a change brought on by this picture) simple daily pages, and a few collections. My master key is based on the one Dee Martinez created, plus her double margins on the left, too. Add to that Ryder’s tracker to the right of each page, and I’m good.

I refuse to look at all those gorgeous bujo works of art that are all over the internet, especially the ones with the calligraphic handwriting because I just can’t. My handwriting has gone to hell from the tremors (and I even dropped color-coding), so it’s better this way. Really, it is. *sniffle*

Much love,
Pip 🙂

©Pip Miller – May 2018

PS: is calligraphic a word?

Energy Healing, Health, Journal

Essential Tremor and Healing

*I was moving some of the more interesting blog posts from my now-defunct other website to here. This is from September 2017.*

In my bios across social media, I state that I live with essential tremor (or on the shorter bios, just have #essentialtremor), but I don’t think many people really know what that is, or what it looks like. Tremors come in many shapes and forms, including Parkinson’s, but the type I have affects my hands and arms – and in extreme stress, my head and voice. Katharine Hepburn had essential tremor, though almost all reports mislabeled it Parkinson’s.

I’ve been sick with bronchitis the past two weeks, and as always, medications mess with my tremors. Even ones that are for tremors!! I had hoped to go into work today, not only to give the poor man who is covering my days a break, but because bills don’t stop for illness. 😉

Instead, this is how my day is going, and will until my meds are gone in another week or two. And there’s no guarantee that they will calm back down after the meds are gone, either. Last time it took months.

On the cool side, when I send someone energy (and especially in person), sometimes it feels like an internal energetic massage, and from what I hear, feels really good!

Life’s never boring, is it? 😉

©Pip Miller – September 2017/December 2017

Divination, Dry Life, Energy Healing, Health, Journal

Holidays, Drinking, and Donations

by https://unsplash.com/kelleybozarth

It’s the 4th, as everyone knows, and holidays seem to be more about getting soused than celebrating the actual reason we have the holiday, am I right? Everything you see and watch gives the impression that one cannot fully enjoy a holiday without a drink in one’s hand…well, I’m here today to do just that.

The past 3 days have been…well, they’ve been. Yesterday I rounded the corners on two decks with trimmed borders, and then I spent most of the afternoon trimming my DruidCraft tarot (pictures are on Instagram, and wow, what a difference in size and look!!!!).  Having something to do really helped when the thoughts of drowning myself in alcohol crossed my mind; I was able to notice how the feeling ebbed and flowed and the same for the intense emotions that caused the desire ( I also noticed how often the thought of drinking to deal with various thoughts and situations crossed my mind). We really – well, I really – do let emotions drive reactions, and if the instantaneous reaction is removed, the control of the emotions is lessened.

I’ve know this, we all read about it, yet putting it into practice isn’t always easy. It will be interesting to see how stepping back will play out over the month.

breast cancerOn a serious note, again, the whole point of this Dry July is NOT about me not drinking for a month, it’s to raise money for breast cancer. I am saving what I would have normally spent on alcohol and am going to donate it at the end of the month (considering my salary, the amount is astonishing when I add it up in my head). I’ve been watching my friend’s donation page, and I haven’t seen any new donations and this makes me sad. A fund-raiser to get a new online sci-fi series garnered millions in days, and kickstarters are raising funds every day, yet something as serious as a breast cancer walk is barely getting a drop. Why is that? Is it because being able to watch something like said series or having a concrete item in hand once the kickstarter goes through gives a feeling of ‘a bang for your buck’, whereas donating to research that may one day help someone but at the moment gives you, yourself, nothing concrete in return doesn’t?

Without the funds, research can go no where. Research for my essential tremor relies on donations, as does research for every single disease, cancer, and affliction there is. All mental health issues, all the one-in-a-million cancers no one has ever heard of…every single one of them. And no, you don’t seem to get a return on your investment, but someone does. And even if that someone is the only person in the entire world who does, do they not deserve a chance? Don’t we all know of someone who has died of breast cancer? Don’t we all know someone who is now undergoing treatment for it and is fighting daily for his or her life? Don’t they deserve the chance for better treatments that come about from the research that is made possible by your donation?

So please, while you’re reading along and checking out my Instagram pictures (lots of tea, lol!)…take the time to donate. Every little bit helps, even $5. Plus, my friend has been training really, really hard for this walk (and if you knew her from back when, you’d be just as amazed and proud of her as I am). It would be so sad if she didn’t meet her goal and was unable to participate, so let’s kick it up and get her over that goal!

And thank you, from the bottom of my heart, because hell, every single one of us has the chance of getting cancer, and that includes me. And if it happens that I do one day contract it, well, I want to thank all of you ahead of time for the treatments that will give me a fighting chance. And if it’s you, I will be so happy to have been of help before you knew you needed it.

©Pip Miller – July 2015

 

Energy Healing, Health, Journal

Essential Tremors; Do You Crash, Too?

photo-1422190441165-ec2956dc9eccIn the past couple of years, something unusual has started to happen whenever my tremors are bad for an extended period of time: I crash. I’ll be really tired one day (yesterday) and then I will sleep 12-15 straight hours. That next day (today) I will still be sleepy, but it’s a bit more of a recuperative sleepy than a ‘need to sleep’ sleepy.

This past week they were very obvious, and I found little things difficult, like typing while ringing up a customer at work, or reaching into the pendulum case and doing my best not to knock every single one of them to the mirror below. Writing was almost illegible, so the letters I’ve been meaning to send have been put off until my handwriting won’t look like chicken scratch. I believe the tremors have gone up a notch in intensity and are going to stay there because they haven’t calmed down like they normally do. 😦

I took a video of my hand shaking after I did ‘dog duty’ (aka: picked up poop). Crazy, right?

Now, I know there are millions of people out there with essential tremor, and I’m curious: do other people ‘crash” after an extended bout of intense tremors, or is it just me?

Don’t get me wrong; the sleep is fantastic, but I never know exactly when a crash is going to come, and if that next day s a work day, it’s not easy. Luckily I’m off today, or I’d be quite the zombie. Instead I’m taking it easy today, and am about to send some healing light to a friend’s dog. 🙂

I’d love feedback from others who live with tremors!

©Pip Miller – June 2015

Health

Life with Essential Tremor

I was at work today, attempting to write codes on price tags, and noticed that my hands were going bonkers. So I thought I’d try to do a quick vid of them, and see if the computer will let it run without attempting to stabilize the tremor. When I put my fingers on the desk, the tremor is mainly being shown from the hand holding the camera.. Ain’t we got fun? 😉

Some days, after I’ve used my muscles (like carrying groceries or handling a shovel), the tremor is nuts. It can take hours before it’s at the point where I can hold a glass and not spill everything in it. I tried to take a video of my hands after one shovel episode (picking up dog doo), but the computer kept stabilizing the movement of my thumb. It was like a hummingbird’s wing.

This is it on Tumblr, but it really gives NO true idea of how fast my thumb, and the rest of my hand which looks suspiciously still though it was bouncing all over the place, is moving.

http://http://thishobbitslife.tumblr.com/post/96383899313/thats-not-a-blurry-shot-thats-my-thumb-check

There are so many who have no clue what essential tremor is, yet it’s one of the most common ‘ailments’ around. The International Essential Tremor Foundation has a wonderful website where you can learn all about this condition. And did you know that Katharine Hepburn had it? That’s what caused her head to shake and the tremor in her voice as she got older. I’m in good company! 😉

So the next time you’re out and you’re dealing with someone whose hands shake – or their head – give pause, it could be ET. And those people you see in restaurants attempting to eat their food without spilling it all over themselves before it reaches their mouth? Most likely ET, too, and one day that will be me. I’ve noticed that many people assume it’s some sort of withdrawal from booze or drugs, and that’s a terrible assumption! So read up on it; who knows, it could run in your family and no one even realized!

©Pip Miller – October 2014